[Cremetti]

May I begin by saying that this is something I leave to the few who can.......... I'm not one of them, and never could be.

Wedding Shooters:
How do you cope?
I've witnessed the stress and terror of the "big" wedding, and I try to imagine what it must be like for the photographer who shoulders such a responsibility.
How do you deal with it all?

I'd love to hear stories, please!

[EnglishBob]

I've shot 5 weddings, and I have to say, I hate it. I am a bag of nerves for days before.

Haven't had any disasters so far, but I say no a lot more than I say yes. That said, the last one I shot bought me a new Flash and Bracket.

[Wedding Shooter]

I have been photographing weddings for about 5 years now. Once you get past the first 20 or so it starts to get easier.

You have a growing confidence in how the day works and what to do in each situation.

Not suggesting that you are wanting to start shooting weddings, but to know how to cope I would suggest someone who wanted to get into it should assist someone for about 10 to 20 weddings before you start really marketing yourself as a wedding shooter.

That way you will have some work to show clients as well as learning from someone on the job. Of course finding someone who is willing to train you especially knowing you want to start your own business could be tricky. You will need to be willing to work for free for a while probably. To be honest, the on the job experience is worth far more then any pay.

The photographer may, eventually, also be willing to pass on work to you if he/she is already booked.

Ultimately you cope by being very familiar with your camera and how to work with people. If you are not good at both these things you are not really ready for taking on weddings. Go out and practice so you will be ready.

The hardest thing for me when I started was working out how to pose people and how to fill out the time with enough photos. I was reasonably confident about working with my camera - just needed work with the people side of things. That is why I recommend working with a pro first. Observe what they do and learn from them.

Alternatively, hire a dress and a suit and get a couple of friends (who are in a relationship) to come out for the day with you and practice with them. You need to have a wedding dress so you can get used to exposing for the dress and posing someone with a wedding dress on. You should really make sure the 'bride' has some flowers as well.

I started the wedding season with two weddings on the weekend and felt a little rusty as it had been about 4 months since I shot the last wedding. Once I stepped into the house and started shooting the flowers everything seemed to flow really well. Just needed to take the first few photos to blow the cobwebs away and I was good to go.

If you are new to the whole wedding thing you need to google wedding photo list and this will give you some shot lists to work through so you know what is going to be the game plan for the day. Of course you need to be ready for the candid moments as well.

Personally, I pray a lot

Cheers,

Chris

[Cremetti]

Thanks Chris.

No, I will NOT be doing weddings at all. It really isnt my idea of anything but hell.
Do you experience awkward people? Drunk, stroppy, or impossible to please?

I would guess you have some stories to tell, dont you!

[Irma]

Hi Cremetti,

I have just done one wedding, and thanks to Chris and other Shuttertalkers that gave me great advice, my experience was really nice. I worked a lot with my camera before, and I tried to know what light conditions I would have in the place, so I was prepared... to me, one of the most important things you have to know... about this matter, everything went really fine...

However, talking about people in the wedding (guests) not all were willing to give me their best face...Many of them were very kind to pose for me, but some of them even turned their faces somewhere else for me to get their back... It was something that I never experience before, as I was those days only dedicated to nature photography. With those unwilling people, I didn't insist or talked with them...

I knew next day that there were some drunk people and people who came too late at the party, but we weren't there anymore, we left the place after the cake was served... I would be interested to know when the photographer should leave the wedding party...

I loved to do that wedding, I have the greatest respect for wedding photographers, really... but I wouldn't do it because I think I am not good at promoting my own work....

Btw, Welcome to Shuttertalk Cremetti...

[Cremetti]

That's good stuff Irma! Thank you very much.
I know it may seem unusual, but I'm interested in these things because I like to hear how people operate.

It's a fact that a good wedding photographer is a special kind of person. I'm definately NOT that kind!

[Wedding Shooter]

Yes - there are many stories to tell

Just as you would expect there are the rude people, the shy people, the happy people. But I thank God that all my clients so far have been nice people. In more then 100 weddings I have had only one person complain about something - a very minor thing that was sorted out easily.

Cheers,

Chris

[Cremetti]

That's really good. You must have the magic touch!

[Wedding Shooter]

Just be polite - amazing how people respond to please and thank you

[Cremetti]

You arent six foot six and an ex marine, are you?

[Wedding Shooter]

6 foot and 1 inch - 80 kgs. Hardly ex marine

[Cremetti]

Only joking, my dear fellow!

[Bloo Dog]

I don't do weddings anymore for various reasons. I've shot AT LEAST 200+ PAID jobs. Some were absolute joys to shoot. Some were just horrible pains.

Photographers should figure their time spent in communication with all of the people as well as for the anguish caused by noncooperative parties. At one time, I would figure in a PITA Pain In The A_ _ charge, but i quit doing that. If I got bad vibes from someone, I'd just say that i was booked and then pass them onto somebody else.

After many weddings, I revised my contract to cover various problems which I encountered. After my second paid, large wedding I added the clause " The photographer will not tolerate harassment or undue interference during the course of the event. The photographer will report the offending party to the wedding directress or the bride. The second offense during the course of the wedding will be grounds for the photographer's immediate departure, and the contractee shall lose all monies paid up to that date." As I became more experienced, I refined those things which I considered to be harassment and interference.

What started the harassment clause was this: I noticed that the B&G had hired friends to be their videographers. One enjoyed taping me at odd moments such as during the ceremony when i wasn't even allowed into the narthex of the church. I could photograph NO images during the wedding. The videographers were exempt from the church rule. One moron taped me sitting in the vestibule as I sat checking my equipment. I walked past him and went to the men's restroom. The guy followed me to the urinal. He and I exchanged words. I told him that he was out-of-bounds, and if he taped me one more time, it'd be the last time he'd see his camera in one piece.

The church shots went okay with the exception of one guy who kept making wisecracks about me. I found out from a sympathetic guest that he wanted to photograph the wedding, but the B&G decided against it. Throughout the reception, I found this guy on my tail. At the cake cutting, I usually allow everyone to take their own photos for ten seconds or so. That way, my job goes unimpeded, and i gain points with everybody. (I do the same in the altar shots. The camera toters don't buy photos). I took a couple of shots, then got down on one knee to shoot from a lower angle.

Then I heard a voice: "Yeah. That's where you belong. On the floor." I felt his foot on my back, and I found myself face-down on the floor. There were a lot of laughs after that.

The MOG (Mother of the Groom) made a lot of snide comments to me about how she had never heard of me, etc.. (This was an upscale wedding, and, as I surmised later, the B&G took the money that was allocated for the photography and pocketed a good portion of it. (This is VERY common). The mother was extremely image-conscious and needed to be the center of attention as often as possible.

Interestingly, the MOG wanted me to stay waaaaay past my contracted time. I answered her in a loud voice, "I'm sorry, but I have have a biker weddin' in a trailer park on the other side of town. I gotta pick up my pistol and ammo. Bye"

The outcome was that the mother called me a week later and DEMANDED the negatives for free. She wasn't interested in reprints. I had had it up to my eyeballs with these folks, starting with the rehearsal dinner at which I was not served or even given a seat in the corner. (The kitchen help was sympathetic and invited me into the kitchen to eat. They were already sick of these people too).

I never wanted to see these people again. They wanted the negatives for free? Sure. I faxed over an agreement that I would not be held liable for any images which they had printed themselves. Furthermore, I would not be held accountable for the arrival of the negatives or for the condition in which they arrived unless they paid for insurance plus a $100.00 shipping, handling, and packaging fee. If they forego the fee, they forego recourse against me as well as heavy packaging. They would receive their negs in a standard padded envelope.

And that's what they got.

A week later, the MOG calls on the phone, screaming at me about how she can't determine what's what, and where is the picture of her in her $2,000.00 Gucci-Smucci dress, and how was she going to have reprints made while her Pookie-Wookie Groom Dream Boy was off in the Virgin Islands for two weeks, and how does she go about setting up a wedding album?

My answer?

Click.

[Wedding Shooter]

Sorry to hear about your negative experiences Bloo Dog. What do you like to photograph these days?

Cheers,

Chris